i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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