Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
