Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
