i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
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