Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize