He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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