My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
