mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
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