so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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