I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
