the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize