Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
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Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
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I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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