the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
there is puke in my bra ... again
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