I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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