Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize