i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
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