My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
