That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
