I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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