so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Randomize
