I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize