If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
The air taste purple.
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