Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
