i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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