isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that