Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
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is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
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I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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