You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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