saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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