Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
