he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Randomize
