I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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