There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
We need to get me chipped asap
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize
