Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
