i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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