So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
But break dance skills will only take you so far
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
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