I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Can you bring me the toilet please
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have a little drunk in my system
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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