Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
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I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
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