id be glad to
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
he fucked my hip out of place.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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