Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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