Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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