great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
