i just had sex bonerless
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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