spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
