New low: just hacked my moms facebook
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize