Whoa Z and x make the same sound
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
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