dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
She announced her abortion via fbk
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Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
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Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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