so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
