Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
