I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
50% drunk capacity currently
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
