We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
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