He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
